Hugo Chavez, the president of Venezuela, has exhumed the remains of South American independence hero Simon Bolivar to determine the cause of his death nearly 200 years ago.
Mr Chavez suspects that Bolivar was murdered and did not die from tuberculosis, as most historians believe. Announcing the exhumation of his hero on Twitter, Mr Chavez said he "wept with emotion".
"What impressive moments we have lived tonight. We have seen the bones of the Great Bolivar!" he wrote.
Hopefully there's a curse attached.
"That glorious skeleton must be Bolivar, because his flame can be felt. Bolivar lives!" he added. Then there must be all kinds of gouge marks inside his coffin from when he was desperately clawing at it...
A team of forensic pathologists and criminal investigators are examining the remains to see if Bolivar was the victim of a conspiracy rather than illness, according to Venezuela's attorney-general, Luisa Ortega Diaz.
"We have important discoveries that will be announced to the nation at the appropriate moment," she said. Chew, chew, chew went the brain worms. Munch, munch, munch on his brain. Throb, throb, throb went his headache, as he blamed it on George W. Bush.
Taaaraysaaa! Make it stop!
But this story is deee-licious...
New England boat builders say shame on Sen. John Kerry for buying a $7 million New Zealand-built luxury yacht while local ship makers struggle to find work. Darn, that would have been a wonderful job for a Maine builder, said Jane Wellehan, president of the trade group Maine Built Boats. If someone comes to build a $7 million boat that would employ half the population of some towns for a year or two. Boat building is such a critical component of our coastal economy." Buying "domestic"? That would be like buying a...god forbid...Ford!
Gregory Egan, who owns the Crosby Yacht Yard in Osterville, said Bay State boat builders must feel cut adrift by Kerry as well. Im confident that anything constructed in New Zealand could be constructed here in the state, he said. From a political perspective, it seems to me he could have thought twice about that one. But that would mean he'd have to have two thoughts. At once. I don't know if he's capable of that.
News that Kerry was docking the 76-foot custom-built sloop in Newport, R.I., was first reported in the Herald Friday. Sources told the Herald the yacht cost $7 million, meaning Kerry would owe the state more than $500,000 in excise and sales taxes. The Isabel has two VIP main cabins, a glossy teak interior and a wet bar and wine storage in the pilothouse. It is billed as a departure from the norm in the opulent world of yachting and designed to be piloted without a crew. ...and Jawnny likes "opulent".
With the nation enduring a nasty economy, painful joblessness and extreme belt-tightening, word of the luxury yachts foreign construction - as Americans yearn for work - could create a political tempest for Kerry. The message is, The American boat builders arent good enough, and the Massachusetts people arent good enough to maintain it. Its just a bad message all around, said Connecticut boater Steve Potter, who docks in Charlestown. Now, now...I will allow them to look at it.
When asked to respond to criticism of Kerrys decision not to buy American, his state director, Drew OBrien, said: When it comes to creating and preserving jobs and economic opportunity in Massachusetts, no one has worked harder in Washington than John Kerry. Sen. Kerry is using smarts, clout and good old-fashioned hard work to make the Massachusetts economy grow and prosper. He wouldn't know "good old-fashioned hard work" if it bit him in the ass. I'll translate his non answer answer: Ungrateful peasant bastards! And after all I've done for you!
Steve Capozzola, media director for the Alliance for American Manufacturing, was surprised at Kerrys move. House Democrats are pushing legislation to boost American manufacturing jobs. Its ironic that hed be buying a foreign-made boat when the House Democrats are considering a number of measures to revitalize American manufacturing, he said. Steve sounds like a true believer. Maybe having second thoughts about their plan, buddy?
The Isabel is owned by Great Point LLC in Pittsburgh, according to a U.S. Coast Guard registry. Pittsburgh is home to Kerrys ketchup heiress wife, Teresa Heinz Kerry. Great Point is a lighthouse in Nantucket, where Kerry has a waterfront manse. Yes, it's my...wife's boat! Just like the SUVs. And the mansions. And the Gulfstream. So begone, peasants!
Massachusetts has a 6.25 percent sales tax and local boat excise taxes, but Rhode Island does not tax boats. Kerry has homes in Boston and Nantucket, but has said he docks his yacht in Newport for upkeep and charter purposes. Kerrys spokesman has said the senator will pay taxes if they are owed. As Tommy Menino would say, "This is becoming an Alcatraz around his neck"...
When asked Friday whether he would move the boat, Kerry was noncommital. Thats a decision in the future, he told reporters As much as he would like it to, this ain't going away...
#4
As I see it Teresa Heinz married into wealth--John Heinz (Heinz catsup fortune). She inherited her husband John Heinz III's fortune when he was killed in a plane crash. John Kerry then married Teresa Heinz. Limousine liberals (or Rolls radicals). Life is good eh Jawn? Thought you might have gone with a French boat builder.
A multi-volume chronology and reference guide set detailing three years of the Mexican Drug War between 2010 and 2012.
Rantburg.com and borderlandbeat.com correspondent and author Chris Covert presents his first non-fiction work detailing
the drug and gang related violence in Mexico.
Chris gives us Mexican press dispatches of drug and gang war violence
over three years, presented in a multi volume set intended to chronicle the death, violence and mayhem which has
dominated Mexico for six years.
Rantburg was assembled from recycled algorithms in the United States of America. No
trees were destroyed in the production of this weblog. We did hurt some, though. Sorry.