WEST Australian Opposition Leader Troy Buswell says there is "absolutely no substance" to reports he once did something inappropriate to a quokka.
"You pronged a quokka?"
"No, no! Of course not! It was another kind of wallaby."
But he said he had heard people mention the word "quokka" then start laughing.
"Arf! Arf! Arf! Hid the baloney with a quokka! [Snicker!]"
Mr Buswell, who has admitted to sniffing the chair of a former Liberal party colleague and snapping the bra of a Labor staffer, was questioned on the rumours today at a press conference at Parliament House.
"Mr. Opposition Leader! Wuz it a male quokka or a female quokka?"
"Mr. Opposition Leader! Did you sniff the wallaby's chair, too?"
"What color bra does a quokka wear, Mr. Opposition Leader?"
It followed his move yesterday to sack Paul Omodei from the front bench after the former leader said recently there would be "more stories" to emerge about Mr Buswell and that his leadership would "die the death of a thousand cuts".
"Oh, wait'll you hear the one about Mr. Opposition Speaker, the circus midget, and the platypus!"
Asked if he had done anything inappropriate to a quokka, Mr Buswell replied: "No".
"Depends on yer definition of 'inappropriate,' of course, but neither of us thought it wuz inappropriate!"
Asked if he was aware of any rumours about actions involving the small marsupials, which are indigenous to Rottnest Island off Perth, Mr Buswell said: "I have absolutely no idea about these stories of quokkas on Rottnest. I'm not being backward in saying that I'm not a perfect individual and you know I've had a robust past and there may be elements of that that have proved offensive to people.
"Though I'm not sure why you'd be offended by me sniffing yer chair if you're not sitting in it at the moment..."
"I don't shy away away from that at all, but I'm not aware that I've caused any offence to a quokka."
"Matter of fact, it seemed quite pleased by the experience!"
#4
Sounds like the story of Lyndon Johnson when he ran for Congress, legend says, he wanted to spread the rumor that his opponent was a pig-f*cker. Johnson's campaign manager said, "Lyndon, you know he doesn't do that!" Johnson replied, "I know. I just want to make him deny it."
ICARUS crashed and burned when he flew too close to the sun but a modern-day Swiss adventurer has had a happier landing after testing his new jet-powered "wing".
Yves Rossy, the self-styled "Fusionman", leapt into the skies 2500m above the small town of Bex in western Switzerland today clad in his new carbon wing. He performed various manoeuvres for five minutes before landing with the aid of a parachute.
His "wing" is 2.5m in diameter and comes with four tiny jets, which are lit inside the plane just before he jumps. Once in full flight, Rossy can reach speeds of up to 300km/h, but he can only stay in the air for a maximum of ten minutes due to the small fuel capacity of his jets.
Rossy, a 48-year-old former air force pilot who now works for the airline Swiss, first unveiled his design in 2004. It hasn't always been an easy ride though - during one jump in 2005, he lost control of his wing and didn't open his parachute until he was just 500m above ground.
#1
i would think the pilot of the 'mothership' can't help but be a little nervous everytime Rosey lights up, inside the plane. what if he trips?
And I refuse to snark the 10 minute fuel capacity in any reference to Lawn Darts.
New Yorkers interested in avoiding the gridlock of highway traffic on their way to the beach this summer now have the option of purchasing a Hamptons Helicard.
For prices between $28,000 and $82,000, Blue Star Jets is offering membership in what the company is calling the first-ever helicopter club to the Hamptons. They claim it will eliminate the woes of traffic on the Long Island Expressway. The different packages offered include ten one-way trips for $28,000, 20 one-way trips for $55,000, or 30 one-way trips for $82,000 between the city and the Hamptons. Each leg of the trip takes about 30 minutes and comes with complimentary Champagne.
h/t Instapundit, who quips:
"AND WHEN YOU GET THERE, BE SURE TO BITCH about the Bush Administration's position on global warming."
Posted by: Mike ||
05/14/2008 10:18 ||
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#1
Uhm, there is no "global warming". In the nearly 70 years since 1940, the temperature has been steady to cooling for 50 years and warming for 20 (roughly 1978 to 1998) and the temperature is still not as high today as it was in 1933 (or 1998 for that matter).
The sarpanch of backward Gangapada gram panchayat has alleged that concrete structured community latrines were stolen from the village.
The stole the friggin' scheisshaus?
For apparent reason, the unconventional complaint of this nature has created ripples in these parts of the state.
Mrs Mamatarani Dhal, in a note to Kendrapara block development officer, charged that there has been theft of two latrines built during 2006-financial year as part of village sanitation programme. "After I got elected as the head of the panchayat body last year, I had made it a point to take stock of movable governmental assets and property under the panchayat jurisdiction".
"I was shocked to be informed that there is no physical trace of the recently built latrines. Thus I take it for granted that either theft has occurred or central grants spent for the purpose were gobbled up by the then PRI members. That is when I thought it prudent to register an official complaint before launch of a thorough inquiry into the matter," Mrs Dhal added.
"In the event block officials ignore my complaint, I would lodge an FIR in the nearest police station," she added.
The latrines that now stay on the top of missing gram panchayat assets had purportedly come up during 2006-07 fiscal year at allocated of Rs 40,000. The funds spend were released from twelfth finance commission grants. It is widely believed that the grants were never spent for the building of latrines. Instead the then PRI members made outright embezzlement of the same. The physical existence of the "contentious" latrines was confined to the gram panchayat records only.
Posted by: john frum ||
05/14/2008 00:00 ||
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The sarpanch of backward Gangapada gram panchayat has alleged that concrete structured community latrines were stolen from the village.
This article reminds me of reading the newspapers in India - they were nominally in English, but with a whole bunch of words that made no sense at all - sarpanch, gram panchayat, etc.
At least on the web, I can look up the terms, and sometimes even find them via wikipedia, google or other sources.
Posted by: Rambler in California ||
05/14/2008 18:21 Comments ||
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A multi-volume chronology and reference guide set detailing three years of the Mexican Drug War between 2010 and 2012.
Rantburg.com and borderlandbeat.com correspondent and author Chris Covert presents his first non-fiction work detailing
the drug and gang related violence in Mexico.
Chris gives us Mexican press dispatches of drug and gang war violence
over three years, presented in a multi volume set intended to chronicle the death, violence and mayhem which has
dominated Mexico for six years.
Rantburg was assembled from recycled algorithms in the United States of America. No
trees were destroyed in the production of this weblog. We did hurt some, though. Sorry.