Article

2007-04-03 India-Pakistan

'Jihad' Declared Against Uzbek Militants In Tribal Area

Archived material is restricted to Rantburg regulars and members. If you need access email fred.pruitt=at=gmail.com with your nick to be added to the members list. There is no charge to join Rantburg as a member.

Posted by Steve 2007-04-03 07:29|| || Front Page|| [3 views since 2007-05-07] Top

#1 'Jihad' Declared Against {fill in blank }

fatwa form #17

Posted by Spot">Spot 2007-04-03 08:12|| 2007-04-03 08:12|| Front Page Top

#2 So when's the local Human Rights Watch contingent gonna show up to investigate this thing?
I figure if they do, the jirga will have them over for dinner. They'll be the main course...

Posted by tu3031 2007-04-03 10:25|| 2007-04-03 10:25|| Front Page Top

#3 I know I can go online and get a certificatee to be a minister. Is there a place I can become a Iman? I have an ex-fellow employee I would like to declare Jihad against.

Posted by plainslow 2007-04-03 11:36|| 2007-04-03 11:36|| Front Page Top

#4 Plainslow - Here's a little help:
How to become an imam
Online list of fatwas
I'm sure there's something in there for your situation!

Posted by Spot">Spot 2007-04-03 12:08|| 2007-04-03 12:08|| Front Page Top

#5 Well, you'll need a funny hat. And a scraggly beard. And you'll have to gain a hundred or two pounds.
And you might want to have a body part surgically removed. That makes for big street cred with the Jihadi wannabes. Say you lost it to the Russians, or the Indians or, if you really wanna push it, the Great Satan himself.

Posted by tu3031 2007-04-03 12:19|| 2007-04-03 12:19|| Front Page Top

#6 Can I commission an imam to declare a fatwa against overtime and using "comprised of" instead of "comprising"? I've got $50 and a beat-up old PC, if that helps.

Posted by Jonathan">Jonathan 2007-04-03 13:38|| 2007-04-03 13:38|| Front Page Top

#7 Johnathan, you'll have to contact our staff imam, al-Aska Paul. I hear he works cheap.

Posted by Steve">Steve 2007-04-03 17:16|| 2007-04-03 17:16|| Front Page Top

#8 You heard wrong Steve. He's got a plane to feed.

Posted by Shipman">Shipman 2007-04-03 17:43|| 2007-04-03 17:43|| Front Page Top

23:46 Ebbeanter Ulemp4173
23:35 Frank G
23:34 Eric Jablow
23:32 Eric Jablow
23:17 Atomic Conspiracy
23:12 newc
23:10 newc
22:59 Jan
22:58 Frank G
22:56 Frank G
22:55 trailing wife
22:48 Sneaze
22:48 Red Dog
22:48 newc
22:43 Ebbeanter Ulemp4173
22:42 Sneaze
22:39 DMFD
22:37 Sneaze
22:35 DMFD
22:34 trailing wife
22:30 Sneaze
22:25 trailing wife
22:24 trailing wife
22:23 Frank G