SCOTT McKie and Victoria Anderson were looking forwards to a life of wedded bliss as they tied the knot. But an hour and a half - and a series of drunken assaults - later, divorce was looming fast.
"I do!"
"I do!"
"Bitch!"
"Arsehole!"
"I want a divorce!"
The tale of what has been billed one of Britain's least successful ever marriages ended with 23-year-old McKie being dragged from his own wedding reception by police, newspapers reported today.
I hate it when that happens, don't you?
"The party was just ruined!"
According to the reports, the happy marriage lasted for all of 90 minutes before Anderson, enraged at a drunken toast to the bridesmaids by her new husband at their reception, violently hit him over the head with an ashtray.
"Take this, you bastard! KAPOW!"
He responded by taking a hat-stand at the pub in a suburb of Manchester, northwest England, where the party was taking place, and hurling it towards the bar "like a javelin", according to witnesses.
"Look out! He's got a hatstand!"
Police were called and McKie headbutted one officer and punched another before being dragged to the cells, at which point 40-year-old Anderson cancelled their honeymoon and began divorce proceedings.
"Hello, Mom? We're not going to Bermuda!"
The sorry tale was recounted at Manchester Crown Court, where McKie pleaded guilty to a series of charges including attempted wounding and assault, receiving a community service punishment. McKie's lawyer told the court that everyone involved had been "very, very drunk at the time".
Gee, I never would have guessed.
Posted by: Steve ||
12/03/2004 10:30:39 AM ||
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#1
"Do you, Britney, take this, uh, man, to be your lawfully wedded husband, form this minute forward, . . ."
Posted by: Mike ||
12/03/2004 10:58 Comments ||
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#2
Damn, sorry I missed that reception. Add some RPG's and AK's firing in the air and it would've had everything...
#10
I'm planning on visiting the Neville Chamberlain Monument on my next trip to the UK.
Apparently the people of Birmingham (England) do actually have a Neville Chamberlain sculpture hidden away: details here. It was unveiled in 1937, 22 years after he'd been elected Lord Mayor of the city. I don't recall ever seeing one of him in London. There are plenty of monuments to Churchill around, natch.
I'm guessin' Night Court.
I don't think we have night courts (I could be wrong -there may possibly be some in the biggest cities, like Manchester). Most likely he spent the night in the cells cooling off and was dragged up before Hizonna in the morning.
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