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2006-03-29 -Short Attention Span Theater-

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Posted by tipper 2006-03-29 01:13|| || Front Page|| [11124 views since 2007-05-07] Top

#1 Booze, Drug, Gambling..eveyone has had family or friends who have been DUMB enough to take the header into addiction.
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*Math/Biz entrepreneur Test*

1) Kieth has 2 ounces of cocaine and he sells an 8-ball to Jackson for $320, and 2 grams to Billy for $85 a gram. What is the street value of the remaining cocaine that he doesn't cut?

3) Sponge Bob wants to cut his 1/2 pound of heroin to make 20% more profit. How many ounces of cut will he need to reach his goal?

4)W Houston gets $200 for stealing a BMW, $50 for a Chevy, and $100 for a 4x4. If she steals 2 BMW's and 3 4x4's, how many Chevys will she have to steal to make $800?

>Crack is God's way of telling you that you have too many brain cells.

Posted by RD 2006-03-29 01:47|| 2006-03-29 01:47|| Front Page Top

#2 Iff MADONNA is a bad girl gone Kabbala legit, WHITNEY is a good/legit girl trying to go bad, and ole Bobby isn't helping. Brought to you by 1968, Ollie Stone and JFK, and AEROSMITH SINGING IN A [FUTURE]MOVIE CALLED ARMAGEDDON [Let Justice be Done/Let the Truth be told, or the Heavens fall - see Exploding Moon Year 2030, etal]

Posted by JosephMendiola 2006-03-29 01:49|| 2006-03-29 01:49|| Front Page Top

#3 WTF are ya talking about Joe? Here, have some kava kava I had on me person. My Gawd, man, yer gettin' too heavy, lighten up.

Posted by Alaska Paul">Alaska Paul 2006-03-29 02:18|| 2006-03-29 02:18|| Front Page Top

#4 I think thats an on topic crack poem AP.

Posted by RD 2006-03-29 03:52|| 2006-03-29 03:52|| Front Page Top

#5 Actually, a Crack Ball is broken into 16 units (rocks) which sell at about $10 each. Most Crack addicts can get by with 2 units per day, usually smoked 6-8 hours apart. An addict with unlimited funds could afford double or triple hits, which would make them non-functional. Whitney's family should seek intervention. Even if cops caught her with Crack, she would end up in another diversion.

Posted by Listen to Dogs 2006-03-29 12:12|| 2006-03-29 12:12|| Front Page Top

#6 After deep consideration over the past few days, it finally occurred to me that CAPLOCK JOE is the political mouthpiece for Dr. Bronner. Ever scan the stuff on the side of those peppermint shampoo bottles and bags of organic chips? Reads about the same.

As to Witless Houston; Some people just aren't happy unless they are making a trainwreck out of their life. The woman has one of the finest sets of pipes since Dianah Ross and all she can do is spew mindless pop music drivel while dating total loser boyfriends. With her sort of earnings, she has had every opportunity and then some to turn her life around. She deserves herself.

Posted by Zenster 2006-03-29 12:16|| 2006-03-29 12:16|| Front Page Top

#7 If she's as hooked as this article says, she's never going to get off it. It's a shame, she had an incredible voice.

Posted by Desert Blondie 2006-03-29 12:24|| http://azjetsetchick.blogspot.com]">[http://azjetsetchick.blogspot.com] 2006-03-29 12:24|| Front Page Top

#8 Maybe that guy who wrote A Million Little Pieces can help her out. I hear he kicked a wicked crack habit [smirk].

I still thank that Joe is an AI that escaped from a secret DoD lab. And here everyone thought that the first AI would try to take over the world. It turns out that all it really wants to do is spout off about politics.

Posted by 11A5S 2006-03-29 12:38|| 2006-03-29 12:38|| Front Page Top

#9 And here everyone thought that the first AI would try to take over the world. It turns out that all it really wants to do is spout off about politics.

I don't know why, but for some reason that is incredibly funny. Good one.

Posted by Zenster 2006-03-29 13:06|| 2006-03-29 13:06|| Front Page Top

#10 The graphic is brilliant, Fred.

Posted by Mike 2006-03-29 14:39|| 2006-03-29 14:39|| Front Page Top

#11 I second the motion. The Acme Deluxe Digital Sympathy Meter is a veritable masterpiece.

Posted by Zenster 2006-03-29 15:02|| 2006-03-29 15:02|| Front Page Top

#12 Credit for this grapic belongs to AutoBartender. Thanks, AB!

Posted by Seafarious">Seafarious 2006-03-29 15:07|| 2006-03-29 15:07|| Front Page Top

#13 Thanks, Zenster. I have a sick, sardonic sense of humor that I usually keep under wraps since it seems to piss off about as many people as it makes laugh.

I had this whole druggie schtick that used to get me into so much trouble in the military. Your average Kansas farmboy with a high and tight has a hard time discerning between lampooning druggies and being one.

Posted by 11A5S 2006-03-29 17:24|| 2006-03-29 17:24|| Front Page Top

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