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2005-11-22 Home Front: Culture Wars

Will Someone For God's Sake Marry Maureen?

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Posted by Deacon Blues 2005-11-22 07:14|| || Front Page|| [11133 views since 2007-05-07] Top

#1 I weary of the self-absorbed clucking of aging poultry.
Oh I've simply gotta steal that line, thank you.

Posted by Redneck Jim 2005-11-22 08:14|| 2005-11-22 08:14|| Front Page Top

#2 Not it.

Posted by Doolittle 2005-11-22 09:17|| 2005-11-22 09:17|| Front Page Top

#3 Poor Mo. Must suck being the Oldest Broad In The Club every friggin night.
But I'm glad she's around. If she wasn't, we'd have to make her up and that would take some work.

Posted by tu3031 2005-11-22 09:48|| 2005-11-22 09:48|| Front Page Top

#4 Maybe if we took up a collection from every male in the USA we could come up with enough dough to pay somebody to marry Mo. Although I doubt it.

Posted by Jonathan">Jonathan 2005-11-22 10:09|| 2005-11-22 10:09|| Front Page Top

#5 Jonathan - better yet buy her the worlds best gigilo for one night so she can remember the rest of her life what she can't have.

Posted by 3dc 2005-11-22 10:58|| 2005-11-22 10:58|| Front Page Top

#6 "Men are vain, frightened, immature, unreliable, treacherous, fascinated by gewgaws, obsessed with sex, and unfaithful."

Forgot to mention that we're also "beer-swillin', sports-watchin', gun-totin', cheer-leader-gawkin', flannel shirt-wearin', big-hairy-ball-scratchin' Neanderthals"... Mmmm beer-swillin'...

Posted by Hyper">Hyper 2005-11-22 11:40|| 2005-11-22 11:40|| Front Page Top

#7 ... she can remember the rest of her life what she can't have.

I think that would be Michael Douglas. She'll carry that to her grave.

Posted by Raj 2005-11-22 12:13|| 2005-11-22 12:13|| Front Page Top

#8 You are a competent if sophomoric writer.

That is by far the cruelest cut.

Posted by Secret Master 2005-11-22 13:03|| 2005-11-22 13:03|| Front Page Top

#9 Thanks Hyper, I needed that. But drop the flannel. A tucked in shirttail makes my balls itch.

BTW, David Gest is available to walk down the aisle.

Posted by ed 2005-11-22 13:26|| 2005-11-22 13:26|| Front Page Top

#10 but she still looks as though a vocational school held an injection-molding contest and everyone lost. That leaves her with only her personality as bait. The prognosis is grim.
I love Fred's writing style.

Posted by Deacon Blues">Deacon Blues 2005-11-22 15:26|| 2005-11-22 15:26|| Front Page Top

#11 "Will Someone For God's Sake Marry Maureen?"

Actually, there are many viable candidates that would suit Ms. Dowdy. However, as a Christian, Jesus commands me to be charitable to the poor, the lame, the blind, and the deaf. I pray that you excuse me, for I cannot participate in good conscience.

Posted by Ptah">Ptah 2005-11-22 15:35|| http://www.crusaderwarcollege.org]">[http://www.crusaderwarcollege.org] 2005-11-22 15:35|| Front Page Top

#12 Is her Father still alive?

Posted by .com 2005-11-22 15:58|| 2005-11-22 15:58|| Front Page Top

#13 A woman who was a masochist asked her sadist male friend to give it to her and make it hurt. He said "NOPE."

Posted by Wimply6355 2005-11-22 16:14|| 2005-11-22 16:14|| Front Page Top

#14 LOL. Um. No. Frank?

Posted by Shipman 2005-11-22 18:21|| 2005-11-22 18:21|| Front Page Top

#15 Wonder what she thinks of Hillary.

Posted by Ebbeling Pholuns6985 2005-11-22 18:22|| 2005-11-22 18:22|| Front Page Top

#16 I wouldn't do her with yours. Bitchy, high-school-girl-cliquish, angry, and forever pissed that she has no man in her life with all the God's gifts she has to offer? Sounds like something Bill Clinton should be sentenced to...oh wait, he is...

Posted by Frank G">Frank G 2005-11-22 19:12|| 2005-11-22 19:12|| Front Page Top

#17 Well Maureen, I guess oral sex is completely out of the question?

Posted by Besoeker 2005-11-22 19:18|| 2005-11-22 19:18|| Front Page Top

#18 Men are vain, frightened, immature, unreliable, treacherous, fascinated by gewgaws, obsessed with sex, and unfaithful.

Wait, and women aren't? Am I missing something? The only possibly debatable point is gewgaws,and having worked at Hallmark before, I can assure you that Hell hath no fury like a woman who cannot buy that figurine in a different color.

Posted by SJB 2005-11-22 20:25|| 2005-11-22 20:25|| Front Page Top

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