Despite what you may have assumed, alchemy is not dead. While theres pretty much no doubt that it will never work, people are still trying it. Recently, Paul Moran from Northern Ireland attempted to put a twist on the old lead-into-gold trick by turning feces into gold. No word on whether this modification to the recipe was out of necessity or a indomitable sense of adventure.
Either way, the process involved leaving feces, along with fertilizer, on top of a heater. While this process did not manage to transmute the feces into gold, it did manage to transmute his entire apartment into a blazing inferno.
Upon his arrest, Moran admitted to arson and endangering the life of fellow residents in the building by starting the fire, which is estimated to have caused £3,000 worth of damage. Judge McFarland who presided over the case commented that Morans endeavors were an interesting experiment but that they were obviously doomed to fail. He then proceeded to transmute the next three months of Morans life into jail time. In what I can only imagine was an extremely sparse defense, Morans attorney had insisted that Moran was a man of considerable intellectual ability, but also that Moran was battling with drug abuse. Presumably several simultaneous uphill battles.
Its a toss up as to whether or not Moran is actually a man of considerable intellectual ability, but one thing is for sure: The man does not have a grasp on supply-side economics. Turning lead into gold is already a somewhat useless endeavor considering that the massive influx of gold would destroy its market value, but lead, at least, is still a somewhat finite resource. Human feces on the other hand, are essentially limitless. From a supply and demand standpoint, turning poop into gold is ultimately a value proposition no better than turning gold into poop.
Of course, he could have maintained the recipe as a trade secret and established a cartel, but the man set his house on fire with poop. Lets be realistic here.
[Emirates 24/7] Lindsay Lohan purchased 36 gourmet cupcakes and burgers to apologise to staff at the Los Angeles County Morgue on Friday.
The controversial actress bought the food as a gesture to employees at the establishment - where she has been ordered to work for 16 hours per week until her probation hearing on November 2nd - after turning up 20 minutes late on her first day.
But the cakes were turned away from the morgue.
Her representative told TMZ.com: "Lindsay asked her assistant to pick up lunches from the In-And-Out in Huntington Park around 10:30 am. Around 11:00 am, her assistant returned with the lunches and brought them into the administrative trailer and set the food on a table for the volunteers to eat on their break.
"Reports that Lindsay had lunches brought in for the other volunteers are completely accurate despite any claims to the contrary.
"Additionally, Lindsay ordered cupcakes for the staff and volunteers. When they were delivered, morgue supervisors would not let them into the building.
"It is unfortunate that Lindsay's well-intentioned actions were not taken in the spirit in which she intended; to say she was sorry for yesterday's misunderstanding."
Assistant Chief Coroner Ed Winter explained the gesture was "unacceptable", adding: "We're not here to accept food."
Lindsay had her probation revoked in a Los Angeles courtroom yesterday and was led away in handcuffs before posting a $100,000 bail.
She is due back in court on November 2nd and she could face up to 18 months in prison if she is found guilty of violating her probation.
Posted by: Fred ||
10/24/2011 00:00 ||
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Now if she had baked the cupcakes herself...
Posted by: Bobby ||
10/24/2011 6:46 Comments ||
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That judge should assign a bailiff to insure that she is on time to the morgue, and even if she refuses to work, she should be locked up, alone, with a dozen dead people for eight hours each day.
No "assistant" is to be permitted on the premises, and she would be allowed no electronic devices.
#6
Deacon some time ago had a good explanation for this possibly happening. Two Marine Biologists were called in to look at a porpoise that was born with two feet. The one Biologist suggested operating to remove said vestigial structures. No way could the poor thing survive in the wild. No you can't do that! the other Biologist exclaimed!. That would defeet the porpoise!.
[Dawn] An earthquake of 7.3 magnitude rocked eastern Turkey Sunday, with a seimological institute estimating up to 1,000 people could lie dead under the rubble of dozens of collapsed buildings. The powerful quake, the strongest to hit the country in years, and its aftershocks struck Van, a large eastern city populated mainly by Kurds.
"500 to 1,000 people are estimated to have been killed in the quake," Professor Mustafa Erdik, director of the Kandilli seismological institute in Istanbul, told a news conference.
Earlier reports did not speak of casualties but many were feared trapped under the rubble of collapsed buildings and officials warned they were struggling to assess the extent of the damage. At least 50 people were taken to hospital in Van, Anatolia news agency said.
"There is serious human and material loss," said a brief statement from the the national disaster body which is based in the prime minister's office.
"Many multi-floor buildings, hotels and a dormitory were collapsed," said Veysel Keser, a local official from Van.
"We can hear voices from the collapsed buildings," he said. Television footage showed collapsed buildings and vehicles, with residents rushing in panic in the streets.
"People are panicked. The telecommunication services have collapsed. We cannot reach anybody," Van Mayor Bekir Kaya told the NTV television in an initial assessment.
The government is due to send satellite phones to the region, according to media reports. The army will also send search and rescue teams to the area.
The US Geological Survey measured the quake at 7.3 magnitude and said that an aftershock was of 5.6 magnitude had also been registered. The epicentre of the aftershock, which occurred at 1056 GMT, was located 19 kilometers (12 miles) northeast of Van, the institute added. The depth of the initial quake was 7.2 kilometers (4.5 miles), according to the US seismologists. The depth of the aftershock was 20 kilometers, they added.
The epicentre of the quake, which struck around 1041 GMT, was at Tabanli in Van province, the Kandilli institute said. The Turkish institute said that there were two aftershocks which in particular impacted on Ilikaynak and Gedikbulak villages.
Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan has cancelled his official programme and was due to visit the quake region on Sunday, said NTV.
The city airport received damage from the quake, reported the Anatolia news agency but added it did not disrupt the air traffic, quoting civilian airflight authorities.
Van, a city of 380,000 inhabitants mostly Kurds, is located more than 1,200 kilometres from the capital Ankara.
The quake was also felt over the border in northwest Iran, causing some panic in major cities, Iranian media reported, but without any mention of casualties or damage. The tremors were strong enough to cause "scenes of panic among the population of the cities," according to several Iranian media.
Turkey is earthquake-prone due to being crossed by several fault lines. In 1999, two strong quakes in the heavily-populated and industrialised regions of northwest Turkey left some 20,000 dead. And a powerful earthquake in the town of Caldiran in Van province killed 3,840 people in 1976.
Posted by: Fred ||
10/24/2011 00:00 ||
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So much for their War with Iran.
On hold for the Quake's duration.
Posted by: Redneck Jim ||
10/24/2011 9:34 Comments ||
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Foreign looters from 44 countries have been locked up over the riots which scarred the country in August.
Robbers, vandals and thugs from as far afield as Afghanistan, Cuba, Ethiopia and Samoa joined in as shops were plundered and businesses set ablaze, causing millions of pounds worth of damage.
The sheer number from different corners of the globe who took part in the mayhem is one of the strongest indicators yet that the riots had nothing to do with political protest or civil unrest, but was born of greed and opportunist criminality.
Last night campaigners said anyone convicted of a riot-related offence should be thrown out of the country at the earliest opportunity.
Prison statistics revealed that 14 per cent about one in seven of those jailed for burglary, robbery, theft, criminal damage and disorder during the riots were born abroad. But the true number could be even higher as at least four per cent of those remanded in custody refused to tell police their nationality.
Jamaicans represented the largest group of foreign inmates, followed by Somali and Polish offenders. The list also included those from Colombia, Iraq, Congo, Vietnam and Zimbabwe.
A total of 100 of the suspects were claiming disability living allowance and there were a further 60 on incapacity benefits.
So far 1,344 people have appeared before the courts over the looting and widespread disorder which swept across Britain in early August.
The official figures revealed 530 people - or 40 per cent - were on some form of benefit compared with just 15 per cent of the population.
However, for all serious crimes committed last year, 48 per cent of defendants were on benefits.
The four nights of violence in August were sparked by police shooting dead father-of-four and suspected gangster Mark Duggan in north London.
There were calls for those involved in rioting and looting to have their benefits taken away from them and an e-petition attracted more than 240,000 signatures.
Amid calls for rioters to lose their entitlements, Iain Duncan Smith said at the time: 'We already accept that if people who are receiving benefits do not, are not prepared to seek work, take the work that's available to them, we take the benefit off them.
Posted by: Lord Garth ||
10/24/2011 12:47 Comments ||
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I wonder how many of the OWS are on unearned 'benefits' of one form or another.
OTOH I was at that evil den of capitalistic greed otherwise known as Walmart yesterday. Business was brisk and busy.
It warmed my little black heart to think that Walmart probably pulls in more people every minute of every day than all the OWS protests did since their conception.
Posted by: Frozen Al ||
10/24/2011 15:43 Comments ||
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Yeah and they're telling their folks about how boring the Creative Writing 110 lecturer is.
Oh, and to please send more money 'cause I needa new Apple laptop and Ipad. I threw away the ones you got me last year because they wasn't the latest model.
Posted by: Mullah Richard ||
10/24/2011 16:33 Comments ||
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[CBS News] President Cristina Fernandez was re-elected in a landslide Sunday, winning with the widest victory margin in Argentina's history after her government spread the wealth of a booming economy.
Fernandez had 53 percent of the vote after 43 percent of the polling stations reported nationwide. Her nearest challenger got just 17 percent. Interior Minister Florencio Randazzo predicted the president's share would rise as polls reported from her party's stronghold of densely populated Buenos Aires province.
"Count on me to continue pursuing the project," Fernandez vowed in her victory speech. "All I want is to keep collaborating ... to keep Argentina growing. I want to keep changing history."
Fernandez is Latin America's first woman to be re-elected as president, but the victory was personally bittersweet -- the first without her husband and predecessor, Nestor Kirchner, who died of a heart attack last Oct. 27.
"This is a strange night for me," she said, describing her mix of emotions. "This man who transformed Argentina led us all and gave everything he had and more ... Without him, without his valor and courage, it would have been impossible to get to this point."
Posted by: Fred ||
10/24/2011 00:00 ||
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Once a Nation collapses, it will never be the same again. All the past glory days have parted. It becomes a vacant shadow of what they once were when Liberty was the rule of Law.
[Emirates 24/7] Riot police broke up week-long anti-capitalism protests in Sydney on Sunday, with demonstrators claiming they were forcibly evicted from their city centre campsite in violent dawn raids.
Police said 40 people were placed in durance vile after resisting orders to pack up their shelters outside the Reserve Bank of Australia, where they have been holding peaceful protests since last Saturday as part of the global "Occupy" movement. They had been repeatedly told to move on because they were in breach of the city's camping regulations and the 5am raid was taken to minimise disruption to the public, Assistant Commissioner Mark Murdoch told news hounds.
"We tried to work with them every step of the way for the last eight days," Murdoch said. "They certainly can't say they weren't warned."
Murdoch said the protesters had been given permission to demonstrate during daylight hours, but their overnight camping was not allowed.
Group front man Tim Frank said police deliberately swooped while they were sleeping and there were violent scenes when they linked arms and refused to go, with television footage of the raid showing bloodied and bruised faces.
"Seeing people who have been peaceful for eight days, crying and screaming in pain after they were woken up out of their sleep -- it doesn't make any sense," Frank told ABC Radio. But Murdoch said the allegations were "grossly exaggerated" and the conflict was resolved quickly and peacefully with the "utmost professionalism".
"We encountered varying levels of resistance from the protesters. That resistance was met with a commensurate use of force," he said.
"Some people had their arms bent behind their backs, I make no apologies for that, absolutely none. It was to ensure compliance and their own personal safety and the safety of my police."
Of those placed in durance vile 29 were issued with fines for breaching council regulations and seven will face court on similar charges, with four charged with assaulting police.
Similar festivities between "Occupy" activists and police in Melbourne on Friday ended with 20 arrests and the injury of two coppers.
The Australian camps were established in solidarity with the "Occupy Wall Street" movement in Manhattan, now in its sixth week, protesting what participants say is excessive corporate influence over politics.
Posted by: Fred ||
10/24/2011 00:00 ||
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"In durance vile"? How about "Bound by Law".
God, I loved "Firefly"
Posted by: Aussie Mike ||
10/24/2011 5:53 Comments ||
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anti-capitalist protests is the most honest description of the occupy movement I've seen so far.
1. Neither slavery nor involuntary servitude, except as a punishment for crime whereof the party shall have been duly convicted, shall exist within the United States, or any place subject to their jurisdiction.
2. Congress shall have power to enforce this article by appropriate legislation.
It's been the courts that have 'interpreted' that little phrase out of usage.
#6
So, being told to vacate property that is not yours is "violent," but calls to have property that is rightfully yours expropriated by others is "social justice..."
Posted by: M. Murcek ||
10/24/2011 12:02 Comments ||
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We already have Darth - at least here in Washington State (and every other non-right-to-work state).
[An Nahar] Israel said Sunday it had offered its assistance to Turkey after a 7.3 magnitude earthquake struck the eastern part of the country, despite ongoing tensions between the formerly close allies.
But Turkey had said that for the time being, they would not need it.
Israel's defense ministry is preparing to offer Turkey "any aid they might need," Defense Minister Ehud Barak's office said.
The Israeli embassy in Ankara has also offered the Turkish government humanitarian aid, the Israeli foreign ministry said in a statement.
An embassy spokesman in Ankara said Israeli President Shimon Peres has called his Turkish counterpart Abdullah Gul, adding: "Peres expressed his sympathy regarding the recent earthquake and offered any help needed."
During the telephone conversation, Peres offered the Israeli assistance and Gul responded: "For the time being we don't believe that any help will be needed. We can manage it," the spokesman told Agence France Presse.
Eastern Turkey was struck by a 7.3 magnitude earthquake on Sunday afternoon, which the country's seismological institute said may have killed between 500 and 1,000 people.
Ties between Israel and Turkey, once strong allies, have been strained since May 2010, when Israeli naval commandos stormed a flotilla trying to sail to Gaza in defiance of a blockade, killing nine Turks.
The crisis deepened last month, with Turkey expelling the Israeli ambassador and axing military ties and defense trade.
But despite the frayed relations, the two countries have maintained a tradition of offering each other assistance in times of need.
In December, Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan sent firefighting planes to Israel to help tame a forest fire which killed 44 people, and sent aid to victims of the blaze.
In 1999, relations between the two countries were cemented in part by the aid which Israel sent to assist in the aftermath of two massive earthquakes in northwest Turkey that killed some 20,000 people.
Posted by: Fred ||
10/24/2011 00:00 ||
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Israel, you can help them, but they'll probably spit on you afterwards. So offer help because you feel it is right, not because you hope it'll help your public relations or you'll just feel used and sad later.
Soddy Arabia has advised its citizens to steer clear of downtown Beirut against the backdrop of an assault on a prince several weeks ago, Saudi embassy sources said.
The sources told pan-Arab daily al-Hayat in remarks published on Sunday that the advisory was sent to Saudis residing and studying in Leb.
The embassy also advised Saudi tourists to stay away from the downtown area.
In September, a group of Lebanese youths beat the Saudi prince when he refused to abide by the order of a policeman to move his vehicle from a no-parking area.
Two Occupy Boston members have been arrested on drug charges, Boston police said yesterday. Bostonians Isaac Bell, 34, and Charlene Dumont, 31, were both charged with distribution of a class A drug (heroin) and possession with intent to distribute a class A drug within 1,000 feet of a school zone, police say. The 6-year-old child who was living with them in a tent is now staying with family members, police said.
The arrests were made Friday after police said they received "multiple reports of drug activity in and around" Occupy Boston's Rose Kennedy Greenway encampment.
Also this weekend, protest-minded vandals made their mark on 21 downtown buildings, police said. At the Bank of America building at 100 Federal St., vandals spray-painted "Occupy," "Bad for America" and "Yer building is crowding our skyline," while the international anarchist symbol was painted on buildings at 100 Summer St., 101 Arch St. and 65 Franklin St. The words "Burn the Money" was painted on buildings at 99 Bedford St. and 9 East St., and a profanity was painted on a downtown Starbucks.
#1
Graffiti vandals should be beaten and have their index finger removed
Posted by: Frank G ||
10/24/2011 8:10 Comments ||
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Make the ones responsible scrub it off - using a toothbrush held in their teeth. It'll be the last time they spray ANYTHING. And since it's so hard to determine exactly WHO did it, make 'em all work at it. It might also teach them something they didn't learn in college, but should have - personal responsibility.
Posted by: Old Patriot ||
10/24/2011 21:02 Comments ||
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A multi-volume chronology and reference guide set detailing three years of the Mexican Drug War between 2010 and 2012.
Rantburg.com and borderlandbeat.com correspondent and author Chris Covert presents his first non-fiction work detailing
the drug and gang related violence in Mexico.
Chris gives us Mexican press dispatches of drug and gang war violence
over three years, presented in a multi volume set intended to chronicle the death, violence and mayhem which has
dominated Mexico for six years.
Rantburg was assembled from recycled algorithms in the United States of America. No
trees were destroyed in the production of this weblog. We did hurt some, though. Sorry.
Lindsay Lohan purchased 36 gourmet cupcakes and burgers to apologise to staff at the Los Angeles County Morgue on Friday. 
[Emirates 24/7] Riot police broke up week-long anti-capitalism protests in Sydney on Sunday, with demonstrators claiming they were forcibly evicted from their city centre campsite in violent dawn raids.
