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British Arrest 13 in Anti-Terror Sweep
Today's Headlines
Headline Comments [Views]
Page 5: Russia-Former Soviet Union
10 00:00 Mark Espinola [4] 
9 00:00 Oldspook [6] 
11 00:00 Frank G [2] 
4 00:00 Shipman [2] 
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-Short Attention Span Theater-
Boston - We're #1 (for worst place to drive)!
Via FARK. Yes, I've finished work for the day...
Finding your way around Boston can drive you crazy (like no one else - Ed.). It's the most challenging city to navigate in America, according to Avis, which based it decision on driving factors such as street layouts, rampant jaywalking, congested freeways, squealing rubber from a white '96 Intrepid with bald tires, days of rain and snow and nuance complexity of directions needed to get from the airport to the city center. Meanwhile, Bakersfield, California, is the least-challenging city for driving, along with Anchorage, Alaska; and Fresno, California.
It's not a challenge, it's FUN!
Posted by: Raj || 08/04/2004 3:08:28 PM || Comments || Link || [4 views] Top|| File under:

#1  Sign language is the key.
Posted by: Matt || 08/04/2004 15:15 Comments || Top||

#2  "Boston Drivers: Putting the "~hole" into "Mass~" for generations...."

Posted by: Carl in N.H || 08/04/2004 15:25 Comments || Top||

#3  1967. Vacation. Father driving rental car. Sounds like nothing changed.
Posted by: BigEd || 08/04/2004 15:39 Comments || Top||

#4  Yup, after learning to drive in Mass, the rest of the world was a piece of cake.
Posted by: Steve || 08/04/2004 16:04 Comments || Top||

#5  Never make eye contact.
Posted by: Mr. Davis || 08/04/2004 16:14 Comments || Top||

#6  I know all the sign language. And several different dialects...
Posted by: tu3031 || 08/04/2004 19:49 Comments || Top||

#7  I learned to drive in northern New Jersey, just outside NYC (NJ Combat Driving Certificate, 4th Degree, with Dent Cluster) and thought I'd seen the worst.

But driving in Boston is absolutely insane. I mean, I'm used to people driving recklessly and aggressively-- to get somewhere. But drivers in Boston seem to be propelled simply by sheer hatred.
Posted by: Dave D. || 08/04/2004 19:49 Comments || Top||

#8  I lived there 2 years. Was scared shitless on the roads the whole time.
Posted by: Deacon Blues || 08/04/2004 20:12 Comments || Top||

#9  heard you had to pay for a fire hydrant to be moved to get a parking space, too :-)
Posted by: Frank G || 08/04/2004 20:39 Comments || Top||

#10  You people simply do not know how to drive.
Posted by: Mark Espinola || 08/04/2004 21:51 Comments || Top||


Priest, Nun Convicted After 'Sex Act' in Car
I like the last line.
A Malawian court convicted a Catholic priest and a nun of disorderly conduct Thursday after they were caught engaged in a sexual act in a parked car with tinted windows. The Malawian priest, 43, and the 26-year-old nun from neighboring Zambia spent the night in police cells after being caught in the act Wednesday, police said. A court in the capital Lilongwe handed down suspended jail sentences of six months with hard labor after the pair pleaded guilty to charges of idleness and disorderly conduct.
They were idly sharing bodily fluids in a disorderly manner? I think my cognition becomes more dissonant by the day...
"These people were caught in a sex act," Assistant Superintendent Kelvin Maigwa told Reuters.
"Hidin' the baloney, they wuz! Packin' pork! She wuz goin' fer a meat ride! I never seen sech a thing!"
Officials in the Roman Catholic Church, whose priests are barred from sex or marriage, declined to comment. Passers by alerted police at Lilongwe International Airport after the parked Toyota Corolla, which had tinted windows, began shaking in what police described as "a funny manner."
"Celeste! Lookit dat! That car's shakin' in a funny manner!"
"Try not to laugh, Hopgood!"
Posted by: tipper || 08/04/2004 1:54:33 PM || Comments || Link || [6 views] Top|| File under:

#1  "Let's park at the airport ... no one will see us there!"
Posted by: ExtremeModerate || 08/04/2004 14:03 Comments || Top||

#2  Cheez, get a room, you two!
Posted by: Steve White || 08/04/2004 14:15 Comments || Top||

#3  ima hate goddam tattletells!

6 month is seem harsh but at least they are not get flying rock treatment.
Posted by: muck4doo || 08/04/2004 14:17 Comments || Top||

#4  "If the Corolla's a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'!"
Posted by: Raj || 08/04/2004 14:23 Comments || Top||

#5  Plane spotters...

***NSFW***
Posted by: .com || 08/04/2004 14:26 Comments || Top||

#6  thanks for warn .com ima check it out later. :)
Posted by: muck4doo || 08/04/2004 14:40 Comments || Top||

#7  "Hello, Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"I think I have a medical problem."

"What's the problem?"

"I have a huge crack in my butt!"
Posted by: Raj || 08/04/2004 15:20 Comments || Top||

#8  Stupid, old, trite and yet somehow funny.
Posted by: Shipman || 08/04/2004 20:45 Comments || Top||

#9  SOunds liek the Church in Malawi has one of those "Liberal" Archbishops - looks liek the Vatican will be yanking his miter (which is what that priest should have done instead of letting the nun do it for him).

Defrock both of em. Obviously they were unable to keep their vows.
Posted by: Oldspook || 08/04/2004 22:44 Comments || Top||


Prosecutors Drop Case Against Druid
 EFL
Prosecutors dropped charges Tuesday against a man who explained that he carried a sword into a shop because he is a druid. At a brief appearance in court last month, Merlin Michael Williams, 26, said previous cases heard by the court had allowed druids the right to carry ceremonial swords, which are used to cast spells and create circles of safety. Williams, of Westbourne, southern England, was arrested July 9 after carrying his weapon while shopping at a store in Portsmouth. The sword was confiscated as evidence. The Crown Prosecution Service said the matter had been considered and "it was deemed not to be in the public interest to continue with the case." Williams, who wore his green and blue druid's robes at last month's court appearance, said his sword, which he calls Talisen, had been returned.
"Yer honor..."
"Is that a cape?"
"No, yer honor. It's me druid robes!"
"Get the hell out of my court and don't come back! Bailiff! Give him his sword. See he doesn't cut himself! Next case!"
"I am just happy to have got my sword back so I can continue with my duties as sword-bearer," he said. "I can understand how the misunderstanding happened with the police but it was all a bit heavy-handed and they should have listened to my explanation." And they shouldn't have laughed so hard either.
Williams is a member of Insular Order of the Druids, which was founded in 1993 at Stonehenge and is one of at least eight self-styled druid groups in Britain. Wouldn't a Druid have been more comfortable with a stone knife? I thought they were bronze age - at best.
Posted by: Super Hose || 08/04/2004 1:20:12 AM || Comments || Link || [2 views] Top|| File under:

#1  heh, it's religion, all this age talk sounds supiciously like logic.. that stuff has nothing to do with religion :-p
Posted by: Dcreeper || 08/04/2004 8:40 Comments || Top||

#2  Williams is a member of Insular Order of the Druids, which was founded in 1993 at Stonehenge and is one of at least eight self-styled druid groups in Britain.

Yeah, but what level is he? Would he be interested in joining a half-elf warrior mage and a halfling thief for an expedition to the Fell Caverns of Liverpool?
Posted by: BH || 08/04/2004 12:13 Comments || Top||

#3  I talk to the trees, but they don't listen to me. . .
Posted by: BigEd || 08/04/2004 12:40 Comments || Top||

#4  Listen to what the Flower People say
Posted by: Chris W. || 08/04/2004 12:51 Comments || Top||

#5  After that inspiring article, Ima gonna find my roots and go out and build me a baby dolman.
Posted by: Alaska Paul || 08/04/2004 13:06 Comments || Top||

#6  wait for the solstice, AP
Posted by: Frank G || 08/04/2004 13:31 Comments || Top||

#7  The autumnal equinox is a-comin' up. Can't wait for summer solstace, and winter solstice is too bloody cold for druid caterwauling.
Posted by: Alaska Paul || 08/04/2004 13:35 Comments || Top||

#8  Woodhenges are cheaper, quicker to build, and more in keeping with local styles. (If you're in North America, that is.)
Posted by: Robert Crawford || 08/04/2004 13:43 Comments || Top||

#9  LOL RC.
siding henge will save you money in the long run tho. I hear there are 20 druid massive monuments eligibile for a special discount.
Posted by: Shipman || 08/04/2004 20:47 Comments || Top||

#10  Of course, for the real Druids among us, I present: The Forgotten Technology. The secrets of building your own megaliths, without having to use pesky sonic antigravity or taking out a loan for that expensive flying saucer.
Posted by: Phil Fraering || 08/04/2004 22:10 Comments || Top||

#11  LOL Phil, but he doesn't have nearly enuf beer gut to have done all that carpentry
Posted by: Frank G || 08/04/2004 22:15 Comments || Top||


Britain
The Queen recycles leftovers
Britain's Queen Elizabeth likes simple unspiced food and abhors waste to the extent of warming up leftovers, according to a bbc documentary to be broadcast next week. Celebrity chef Gary Rhodes spills the beans on life backstairs at Buckingham Palace, revealing details such as the traffic lights on the corridors that turn to red when a royal approaches so that junior footmen can disappear into a handy closet. Buckingham Palace yesterday denied the lights existed.

Rhodes, who worked in the palace as a teenager, told the public broadcaster's Radio Times magazine that the queen likes her Martini stirred and not shaken, unlike James Bond. The programme, All the Queen's Cooks, to be screened on August 10, reveals the palace Sunday roast is recycled into cottage pies or rissoles.

Rhodes said the royals eat very little. He said: "There was hardly anything on the plates. I wanted to say, 'Go on, get stuck in', but of course you couldn't speak. In fact, you weren't allowed to sneeze, cough, scratch your nose - nothing. I used to have a nightmare in which I farted in the dining room."

The queen favours plain food, such as lamb cutlets or roast beef, and bread and butter pudding or ice cream to follow. She hates spicy food and tomato pips, because they get stuck in her teeth. Taking afternoon tea - which consists of scones, potted shrimps, thin cucumber sandwiches without the crusts and a special royal blend of tea - is one of her favourite pastimes.
Posted by: Mark Espinola || 08/04/2004 2:17:26 AM || Comments || Link || [2 views] Top|| File under:

#1  Don't believe it. Misinformation to fool British taxpayers. They have a pig roast every night and Philip regularly drinks the blood of freshly sacrificed fuzzy-wuzzies.
Posted by: Howard UK || 08/04/2004 4:29 Comments || Top||

#2  ....revealing details such as the traffic lights on the corridors that turn to red when a royal approaches so that junior footmen can disappear into a handy closet.

Why, I think that's a fine idea! Taaaraaaaysa, what do you think?
Posted by: John Fn Kerry || 08/04/2004 12:11 Comments || Top||

#3  Celebrity chef Gary Rhodes spills the beans on life backstairs at Buckingham Palace, revealing details such as the traffic lights on the corridors that turn to red when a royal approaches so that junior footmen can disappear into a handy closet.

SHHHH! There are two you-know-whos, who consider themselves American royalty may read this, and if either the next two elections goes wrong, the whole White House will have to be rewired.

Well there are two of them! The Mozambiqui, wife of the current Demo nominee, and the would-be nominee of 2008, who is probably testing such a system in Chappequa.

Posted by: BigEd || 08/04/2004 12:55 Comments || Top||

#4  They have a pig roast every night and Philip regularly drinks the blood of freshly sacrificed fuzzy-wuzzies.

I've always suspected this.
BTW Howard (UK) is there a prefered outlet for Pith Helmets/Indian Campaign and such like that there?

I'm living in the tropics without proper gear and the natives are uppity.
Posted by: Shipman || 08/04/2004 14:36 Comments || Top||



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Two weeks of WOT
Wed 2004-08-04
  British Arrest 13 in Anti-Terror Sweep
Tue 2004-08-03
  Paks jug 18 Qaeda
Mon 2004-08-02
  Pakistan confirms arrest al-Qaeda computer expert
Sun 2004-08-01
  Iran Resumes Building Nuclear Centrifuges
Sat 2004-07-31
  Paleos Kidnap, Release Aid Workers
Fri 2004-07-30
  Blasts hit embassies in Tashkent
Thu 2004-07-29
  Foopie jugged in Pakland!
Wed 2004-07-28
  Sammy has a stroke
Tue 2004-07-27
  Iran has broken seals on uranium enrichment centrifuges
Mon 2004-07-26
  Pak cops hold a dozen after gunfight
Sun 2004-07-25
  Sudan Bad Guyz Threaten Attacks on Western Troops
Sat 2004-07-24
  Bad GuyzTorch Paleo Cop Shoppe
Fri 2004-07-23
  Egyptian diplo kidnapped
Thu 2004-07-22
  Yemen: 'Accidental' boom kills 16
Wed 2004-07-21
  Al-Oufi maybe almost banged in Riyadh shoot-em-up


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