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2015-08-11 -Lurid Crime Tales-

Two killed in knife attack at IKEA in Sweden; two arrested

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Posted by Fred 2015-08-11 00:00|| || Front Page|| [3 views ] Top

#1 "These meatballs aren't halal!"

Posted by Frank G 2015-08-11 15:23|| 2015-08-11 15:23|| Front Page Top

#2 Two Swedish men, an empty tent,
So down to Västerås they went
With Swedish wives in sacks in tow
To see how far their dole would go.

One Swedish man felt ill at ease,
Asked, "Are these halal, if you please?"
The cashier mumbled, "Huh? Halal?
Here is a number you can call."

"Not halal? Not halal?
IKEA meatballs are not halal?"

He told the shoppers near at hand
The pious dinner he had planned.
The Swedes were startled not at all
To hear him fulminate withal,

"Not halal! Not halal!
IKEA meatballs are not halal!"

The little man hopped up and down
And pulled a dagger from his gown.
He first -- for honor -- stuck his wife,
Then slashed at shoppers with his knife.

"Not halal! Not halal!
IKEA meatballs are not halal!"

One Swedish couple felt real sad --
Taboo meatballs was what they'd had --
And, dying, heard their butcher's call,
"Allahu akbar! Allahu akbar! Allahu akbar! Seventy-two virgins for one meatball!"

Posted by Zenobia Floger6220 2015-08-11 16:59|| 2015-08-11 16:59|| Front Page Top

#3 wow
just wow

Posted by Frank G 2015-08-11 18:34|| 2015-08-11 18:34|| Front Page Top

#4 The vermin were Asylum seekers from IIRR Eritrea.

Posted by Bright Pebbles 2015-08-11 19:10|| 2015-08-11 19:10|| Front Page Top

#5 The Swedes were use to using some really big knives, but that was generations ago.

Posted by Procopius2k 2015-08-11 19:37|| 2015-08-11 19:37|| Front Page Top

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